I know I am not the only one to hate dementia! What is there to love or even like about it. It steals your loved one away from you in a slow and painful way. My mother was a smart lady who had her life in order. She and her husband had their lives all planned out, and then Dementia
This was my Mom Sally in 2008 with my Step-Father Marvin at mine and Joel’s wedding.
This was shortly before she retire.
My mother started feeling slow and stupid at work. Her work was taking her longer than ever before and she did not know why. She decided after a couple of years to retire early to save her from the stress and sleeplessness she was experiencing. After that her friends started to notice that she was forgetful and confused sometimes. She would forget what things were called, one day she was trying to order french fries and after much struggling she came up with “fingers”they all tried to laugh it off. The small stuff was adding up and her two best friends would call me to complain because they knew my Mom and Step-Father Marvin were not doing anything about her decline.
And then… Cancer… My Step-Father Marvin was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. They didn’t catch the cancer earlier because Marvin was way to healthy. (ironic) After this diagnosis any chance that my mother would have gotten any testing or treatment went right out the window. It wasn’t that they decided that her condition didn’t matter it was that they had bigger fish to fry and did not really see anything medically wrong with Mom. My Step-Father was great at being her memory so it did not seem like she had a huge looming issue.
The truth didn’t get figured out until after Marvin had passed away. The shock of his death kickstarted her disease into overdrive. They say stress can make things worse and boy did it! Thank goodness for my Step-Aunt Shirley being around at the end of Marvin’s life and during the whole funeral ordeal. I had been kept in the dark for the most part when it came to mom’s problems. Marvin made sure we were involved with a lot of his information and all the legal things to be done pertaining to his dying. We knew that mom was having some difficulties with her memory and word recall but we had no idea of the scope of the issue. During the funeral Mom seemed out of sorts and unable to make any decisions. She was just plain angry at everyone who was involved with making any important decisions. After Marvin had passed away Mom seemed to be depressed most of the time. She did not leave her room much and ate very little. Canned beans was her food of choice when she did eat. She was not cooking or really going out of her room. It was all very confusing to me to come over for a planned outing and find that she was still in bed and really had no idea why I was over. I now wonder is she was confused as to who I was even then.
I talked her into getting a dog(BIG MISTAKE) and she seemed very happy with the dog. She however could not figure out the harness or anything else that pertained to Molly’s care. The dog peed all over her room because Mom had come to the decision that taking her outside to pee was mean. I think she was afraid to go outside if it was dark and that she did not want to get dressed to go outside either. I would try explain things so they made sense to her but she would just get mad at me. Things were just getting stranger by the minute!
So I made my first Mother daughter doctors appointment!
To be continued…
Filed under Dementia, Health
We decided to camp on our new property in September to try to get a sense of what our next steps should be. We took our new camper on the road and gave it a try. Now keep in mind that even though we were staying in a camper we still had very limited power and water… FOUR DAYS and THREE NIGHTS… “NO SHOWER”
FOUR DAYS and THREE NIGHTS… “NO SHOWER”
I was so disappointed while we were on staying on the property, we saw nothing! Not a squirrel, chipmunk, deer, bear, NOTHING! I wanted to see cute animals cavorting in our woods and all I got to see was their scat. We saw deer, moose, and bear scat within a 50 feet of where our camper was situated. It could be the generator or the smell of dogs, sound of chainsaw and/or the sound of gun fire that scared every living animal off of our property! LOL… We were not quiet. Joel did say that he saw two small frogs while he was working but I have no proof!
I had to break out my rubber boots for the occasion since it had rained for days, up to and including our drive up to Maine it was wet
Our Dogs didn’t mind at all… They ran around and enjoyed getting dirtier than ever!
My husband enjoyed the ability to walk out into our “backyard” to shoot. We can’t do that in Connecticut!
We didn’t get a lot of work done while we were in Maine we did make a plan for the future. Joel did get a path cleared from the logging road to the small stream that now looks like a river due to the lovely rain.
We made plans for my cousin Mark to do some land clearing work for us. We are so blessed to have some family around who do have the time and know how to get the job done.
We are excited to keep going forward with the building of our new home and farm in the middle of Maine. We can’t wait for what the future might bring!
Thought For Today
We are a world that needs to thank God for all he provides. What he provides will always be enough! The newest, brightest and best of everything on the market today are not what we need. We need to rely on God to know what we need and stop trying to do His job. I am not saying to sit back and do nothing, while expecting everything to be given to you. We need to work like crazy at whatever work God puts in front of us. Listen to God and follow wherever he leads and we will always have enough. BE GRATEFUL….
Therefore, since we receive a kingdom which cannot be shaken, let us show gratitude, by which we may offer to God an acceptable service with reverence and awe; Hebrews 12:28
WE BOUGHT PROPERTY!
Our biggest family adventure is about to begin. Now I just need to find a job so we can afford to clear the land and build a house.
Lots of equipment needs to be purchased or rented and lots of sweat will be shed. We have a serious amount of work to do!
Look up through the woods you can see a hill. On top of that hill is were our homestead/farm/home will be built.
Our land is just about smack in the middle of Maine on Wooded lot that has been partially clear cut. What this means is that it is a mess! It looks like someone dropped a bomb in the middle of the property. Anything that the loggers did not like was left behind to rot and or grow back. Our whole lot is about 22ish acres. We will be clearing about 12 or so on the top of that small rise. Our land will be filled with Fruit Trees and bushes, chickens, rabbits, goats, pigs, a cow and hopefully a small donkey. We will grow our own food and hunt on our own land. We will be self sufficient (I hate that term)… Using the tools and abilities that God has given us to make a life together. We will rely on God in all that we do, from the choice to leave our city lives behind to what we will grow in our gardens. We can do nothing apart from God who strengthens us.
I can’t wait to sit up on our porch and watch the sun set over the trees. Listen to the crickets chirp and scare the dogs when they jump eat apples we grew, cheese we make and even have pork chops from our yearly pig that we raised. The simple life! HA Ha…. We are retiring to a life where there are never enough hours in the day and everything relies on what you do! God please help us!